Twisted Tales of Toy TortureLittle Drummer Boy

Michael Bailey's tales

All Tale material on this page, the barbeque notice, and the newsletters are copyright 2002, Michael Bailey. All rights reserved.

(Aviva's note: I'm humbled by Mike's dedication to his work. Anyone who puts out newsletters documenting his toy torture adventures is twisted indeed!)

I have a small stuffed donkey here at work. We have hung him with a noose, threatened decapitation with a large pair of scissors, and left him bound and gagged with his head in a stapler. A lady from another office saw that and took him calling herself E.L.F. (Eener Liberation Front - Eener is the donkey' s name). We have recently stolen him back and are planning a bbq for this afternoon. Later this week we intend to imobilize him and place him upside down in a cup of water. That should get a rise out of E.L.F. eh?

HAHAHAHAHA

(later)

My donkey, Eener, has been retrieved again and now sports a "Y" incision (like the kind made for autopsies) and will shortly be returned to his noose to await his fate (drowning upside down in a coffee cup full of water).

CRUD Underground Newsletter #1

CRUD Underground Newsletter #2

New! Controversy! The Vice President of CRUD has taken offense to Aviva's use of the term "twisted" to describe Mike and has sent a stirring defense of his lord and master!

New! CRUD Gazette #6 (Microsoft Home Publisher format, which is not openable by anything but Microsoft Home Publisher [luv that Microsoft and its idiotic proprietary formats], so don't waste your time if you don't have it; also, it's a BIIIG download)

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